Heavely Sword Demo

Developer: Ninja Theory
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Released on: July 27th, 2007
System: Playstation 3
ESRB Rating: Rating Pending
Review based on: Demo download from the Playstation Network
Official Website

The Scoop: A little bit God of War, a little bit hack-and-slash brawler and a whole lotta red hair.

Hitting Start...

• A cut scene starts the game with our heroin and her sister who has a thousand yard stare and something to say that I don't pay attention to, I wanna go kill something because my time is limited. I hit whatever buttons I need to hit to advance...


• I can now run around for a bit and get used to the controls in a safe area; a shiny thing on the ground marks where I can move on to the next area and start playing. After a poking around the controls a bit (which seem nicely responsive) I hit the button to move on.


• Off we jump onto one of four huge ropes and rail-slide down it like it's Jet Set Radio future.


• Here's where the "cineractives" start, the camera cuts down to the bottom of the ropes and the bad guys yell out 'cut the ropes' so now we have to react to on screen prompts as we slide. Left, right, left.... and one last huge jump onto the top of a huge stone spire littered with bad guys.


• I played this bit as a hack and slash since I don't really know any of the controls yet (there's no tutorial) but my buddy is telling me about the flashes of colors the enemies make and about stances, combos and special attacks. I don't really care because button mashing seems to be kicking some ass.


• I failed to make one of the button pushes during the cineractive, so I have a mini-mini-boss on this platform to contend with too. All head-on attacks seem useless, but I execute a special attack on some guy where I slam my sword into his crotch and everyone goes flying! Woot!


• Since I'm flailing a bit I'm also taking on a bunch of damage, but I can't tell if there is a health system like Virtua Fighter or like Rainbow 6 or whatever, it doesn't matter though when you get the camera to zoom in on some special attack like the crotch annihilator.


• Everyone on the platform is dead and the next cineractive starts as you ride the huge crumbling spire (that was held up by the ropes) down to the ground. If you time the button click you land nicely like a cat or like a bag of rocks, I land like a bag of rocks.


• Now it's time to dispatch a few more bad guys, and then three more, obviously tougher baddies run thru the doorway at you and you think "All right, a tough fight!"


• And the demo is over, just like that...

"...and I want more, now!"

Am I impressed? Pleasantly.
How come? Even though the demo is utterly short, and I had only enough time to play thru it twice, I found myself thinking about the game several hours later, wanting to play more. I want to learn how to use the various move and stances and I really like the environments shown in the demo. The scale of the world shown to you at the beginning is huge for a game played on foot, so to speak. There's a lot of verticality and it looks like there's a ton of ground to cover.

The only concern I have right now is that it might be an ultra linear game where you just move from arena to arena and fight faceless enemies. The demo doesn't show you anything more than that unfortunately.

The Darkness

Developer: Starbreeze Studios
Publisher: 2K Games
Released on: June 25, 2007
System Xbox 360, Playstation 3
ESRB Rating: Mature
Review based on: Demo downloaded from Xbox Live.
Official Site

The Scoop: "Sopranos" meets "The Exorcist". Based on the comic book that I didn't bother to read.

Hitting Start...

• A cutscene introduces my character: I'm Jackie, I'm Italian, and I'm a mobster. There's one racial stereotype that just won't die.
• I'm in the backseat of a car driven by two of my "crew" who yak on and on about something I should be paying attention to (but I'm not). Just shut-up and give me my damn Darkness powers already!
  
• "COPS!" Wha~! Where!? I can't turn around and look behind me! Is my character in a neck-brace or something?
• I'm given a shotgun and told to use it. On what? Oncoming semi-trucks? I don't think that will get them out of our way.
• The high-speed chase ends with our car being flipped. I get the same result every time I let the wife drive.
• The demo skips ahead to level 3 (I think), a graveyard. I still don't have any Darkness powers yet, but at least I have a couple of gats! (That's what the kids call them, right?)
• Attacked by hitmen—a lot of hitmen! I go down in a blaze of gunfire. Now, Darkness powers! Unleash your anger and avenge me!
• Nope, no such luck; I'm just respawned back to the beginning of the level. :(
• Hitmen attack again! Damn; Jackie aims like he's in the middle of schizophrenic fit! I go down again in a blaze of gunfire. It's not me; it's the controls!
• New strategy: charge the hitmen with both guns blazing. It works! Bah, taking cover is for wimps!
• Tip to remember: you can change weapons with the D-Pad. I imagine the shotgun is more effective at shooting fleshy targets, as opposed to the four-wheeled variety.
• I somehow jerk-walk my way into a bathroom that is home to a bum. "This place smells like Satan's bunghole!" proclaims the bum. Heh, heh; I'll have to use that at the next office Christmas party.
• I make my way back to the graveyard only to find more hitmen waiting for me. But what's this? Darkness powers unleashed! Finally!
• So now I have demon-snakes growing out of me. "Consume the darkness to recharge your powers". What the hell is that supposed to mean?
• Okay, I'm an idiot. "Consume the darkness" literally means stand in the shadows and your snakes will eat the darkness. Yeah, I know; it sounds dumb even as I type it.
• I'm supposed to guide my snake through a grate so it can kill a guy in another room. Sounds cool...if only I could control my snake! (There's a joke in there somewhere.)
• "Press A to devour heart". Sure, why not? It worked for my last girlfriend. Ba-zing!
• My snakes are now eating hearts with reckless abandon. But for what purpose? I know not. But according to a pop-up counter, I have consumed 37.
• I wasn't paying attention, but somehow I can summon demons that will attack my enemies. I really should get checked for Attention Deficit Disorder.
• Okay, I figured it out. Arise demons, and attack!
• I find the sight of my demon sawing off the head of my enemies with a hacksaw both disgusting and compelling at the same time.
  
• More enemies! Demons attack!...I said attack! What the hell—where'd they go? These things part of a Union or something?
  
• Killing these enemies is starting to get monotonous, and my Darkness powers aren't the impressive "force to be reckoned with" that I thought they would be. Not to mention the stiff controls—I wonder if the retail game is this bad....

...and I'm quitting!

Am I impressed? Not really.
How come? Poor controls, washed-out graphics, and a story that I did not find very compelling, no matter how many hearts I ate.